Now that I'm older, I thought it was great that I seemed to have more patience. Turns out I just don't give a shit.
The Importance of Walking
Walking can add minutes to your life. This enables you, at 85 years old, to spend an additional 5 months in a nursing home at $7000 per month.
My Dad started walking five miles a day when he was 60. Now he's 94 years old...and we don't know where he is.
I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.
The only reason I would take up walking is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.
I have to walk early in the morning, before my brain figures out what I'm doing.
I joined a health club last year, spent about 400 bucks. Haven't lost a pound. Apparently you have to go there.
I do have flabby thighs, but fortunately my stomach covers them.
If you are going to try cross-country skiing, start with a small country.
We all get heavier as we get older, because there's a lot more information in our heads. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.
Every time I start thinking too much about how I look, I just find a Happy Hour and, by the time I leave, I look just fine.
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