Things You Find Out When You Have A Son

1 - A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq. ft. house 4 inches deep.

2 - If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with roller blades, they can ignite.

3 - A 3-year old Boy's voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant.

4 - If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong enough to rotate a 42 pound Boy wearing Batman underwear and a Superman cape. It is strong enough, however, if tied to a paint can, to spread paint on all four walls of a 20x20 ft. room.

5 - You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on. When using a ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball up a few times before you get a hit. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.

6 - The glass in windows (even double-pane) doesn't stop a baseball hit by a ceiling fan.

7 - When you hear the toilet flush and the words 'uh oh', it's already too late.

8 - Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.

9 - A six-year old Boy can start a fire with a flint rock even though a 36- year old Man says they can only do it in the movies.

10 - Certain Lego's will pass through the digestive tract of a 4-year old Boy.

11 - Play dough and microwave should not be used in the same sentence.

12 - Super glue IS forever.

13 - No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool you still can't walk on water.

14 - Pool filters do not like Jell-O.

15 - VCR's do not eject 'PB & J' sandwiches even though TV commercials show they do.

16 - Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.

17 - Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise when driving.

18 - You probably DO NOT want to know what that odor is.

19 - Always look in the oven before you turn it on; plastic toys do not like ovens.

20 - The fire department in Austin ! , TX has a 5-minute response time.

21 - The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earthworms dizzy.

22 - It will, however, make cats dizzy.

23 - Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.

24 - 80% of Women will pass this on to almost all of their friends, with or without kids.

25 - 80% of Men who read this will try mixing the Clorox and brake fluid.